It’s finally happened. We’ve been exposed. With the recent ruling by the New Jersey Supreme Court requiring
equal marital rights for same-gender couples, the Homosexual Agenda has been outed by our spiritual leaders—
who urge Americans to vote Republican on Election Day in order to preserve our few remaining national values.
What’s there left to do but come clean? Although we’ve attempted to keep our covert ops cloaked in diverting
sequins, there’s no plugging the leaks that have revealed our subversive intentions. It’s the Pentagon Papers all
The truth began to emerge last week when a male couple was wed in Massachusetts. Twenty minutes later, three
heterosexual marriages fell apart in Kansas City. Under ordinary circumstances, one of our operatives would
have been present to hide the evidence under a stack of Liza Minnelli CDs, but he was watching an episode of I
Love Lucy with his nine-year-old niece so that she could go forth and recruit her young friends in fourth grade.
And marriage isn't the only institution we've infiltrated. In fact, we're present in every headline that frightens you—
you just don’t know it yet.
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